An old man story, 5

This is an old man story

Life is what one want it to be, because even when life is hard, we can always hope for better things to come. We can also try to make it better wherever possible, even when this is hard to achieve.

Welcome to my hub, An old man story, being part of An old man life story. Perhaps I should have called this my life story, including my life missed opportunities and my destiny plus other things, you are all invited to read my hub because this is my life story and nobody else and I invite you to read it, just perhaps to compare it to your own life story.
Dear readers, we all try to live our lives the best way we can, and we all wonder at the things that have happened to us during our lives, but once we have lived those life happenings they all seems to us only a distant dream, they are like a sort of distant memories that will come back to our minds when we try to remember them, sometimes we wonder at the amount of things that we have been through during our lives and it seems almost unreal that we have gone through all those things, but nevertheless it has been our life that we have lived and our life is a story that could be told, so, we would like to tell you our life story, perhaps just to compare our story with other life stories, we would also like to tell our story hoping that there is somebody willing to listen to our life story, perhaps to compare it with his/her own life story, because our live could have been similar or very different from their story, but it is still is a story that could be told, because, you know everybody of us has a story to tell.
So this is my own life story that I am going to tell you here, now, I don’t remember exactly how or when this idea of writing my own life story started, perhaps I have written part of it down somewhere else for personal reasons but I don’t remember now why I wrote that the first time.
But anyhow the reason why I started to write it does not matter much now, because as you know there are many people these days that write their own life story; so, I would like also to tell you my own life story for many reasons, and also to prove to myself that everyone of us as a story to tell, whether my story might or might not be as great as somebody else story it does not matter much, I am also saying this because I believe that I have had a rather hard life and therefore when I write my story, I might be going to lament about this hard life that I have lived. So I guess that not many people enjoy reading or listening to somebody else story, when all they do in their story is to lament their bad luck, so, they are not much fun to read or listen to; but anyhow this is the reason why I have called this hub, an old man story, because old men usually would be lamenting about things one way or another, so let us see what this old man is going to tell about his life observation and his missed life opportunities, while he is telling us his life story and lamenting, but at the same time trying not to lament much for fear of being boring to the readers.
My life missed opportunities

Everyone of us has a story to tell, even if it is only their own life story. So, this is what I am going to do just now, I am going to tell you my own life story. 

Here I would like to tell my life story also because; it makes me remember all the memories and experiences that have shaped my life, so let me tell you my own special life story from the beginning, where I am going to tell you who I am, where have I been where I am now and how I got here, where I am now writing my own life story. I am writing this hoping that one day my family and friends might read my story and understand a bit more about me.
So as I have said, I have decided to tell you my own life story, because of something that has happened to me recently during my life. You see, now that I am in my early sixties, and therefore I am in the later part of my life span. I have to say that although I am an old man now and therefore experienced with life and what life can throw at us and sometimes it can be rather bad; one of my latest experience has made me feel so inadequate and frustrated lately, for not being able to reach out and make happen, what I wanted so desperately to happen. And this is one of the reasons, or perhaps the most important reason, why I have started to write my own life story here and also go public in Hub Pages.
Anyhow, I have also to say that I have felt so many other times before that feeling of being inadequate during my life, which I believe that it has been all because; I was put in a disadvantaged position when I was young, and for that reason I was not able to better myself to a satisfactory standard, which otherwise I would have been able to achieve if I had the chance, so, these are my laments in this life story and laments.
For these lost chances I can’t blame anybody, and I can’t even blame my mother for putting me in such disadvantaged position, because she was forced from disastrous and tragic events beyond her control. So I have come to the conclusion that I can only blame Fate, because it struck a terrible blow to our family when I was very young.
Therefore, if in my younger years I had been in a position to go to high school at least for a few more years, or perhaps as long as my capacity to learn was used to the maximum; Then I could have learned whatever they teach at school, and at the same time as I would have been in a more social environment, and so, I would have been able to improve my social and communication skills while I were at school, those skills which are so important to communicate with the rest of the community nowadays.
Therefore, if I had acquired those social skills when I was young, I would have been accepted socially easily, and I would have felt happier with myself, instead of feeling sometimes left out from the main stream, concerned and isolated.
You see; if I would have had a chance to learn more at high school, then I would have learned more at the time when I was young, and from that extra education I could have been more successful later on in my life, because I could have used my acquired knowledge, and those social skills which I never had the chance to learn then, because if I had, I could have achieved better things and ripped more and better rewards from within this society that we are living in today, which seems to me that it is more and more demanding in these social aspect.
This is one of those things that has made me feel sometimes inadequate and it has followed me most of my life. You see, those social skills that I have been talking about must be learned when one is young, while frequenting high school and mixing with society around yourself, so that these social skills would become part of one self and therefore one can use them to their own advantage all their life long.
Anyhow something about this issue is going to be written in one of our hubs called, Hello my world, where I am going to break out of this life drawback in a drastic way, where I will try to change my own way of thinking; but now let us follow our own ways, or our own destiny.  

Perhaps we have our own destiny

Every one of us has a story to tell, some of us have better stories than others, but a story is a story that is all there is to it; in my case my life story could be connected with my destiny and religious issues and why I am writing all this. 

Today I have to say that there might be something called a destiny, so one might be born to live a certain way of life, or perhaps our destiny is already written in God’s book of our own life and in a way we are forced to live our lives according to what is written in it, therefore our life is going to be influenced by some life events that are behind your control. Now I don’t know what to think about what I have just said, but somehow I believe there is a sort of destiny, but I hope it is not completely fixed and it can be modified to a certain extend if we have the opportunity and continue to try our best. You see if we believe that our destiny is fixed then there is no way that we could change it, so, it is better if we believe that we can change it somehow, but anyhow things happen for a reason, so they affect our life one way or another. 
Anyhow, dear readers as I have already said, I have come to blame my fate for most of my life short comings and pains. Because I believe that when I was born, I was born with a good chance to live a better life; but it was not to be, that is the reason why I think that perhaps it was my destiny. So my dear readers if you happen to read my life story, you may very well ask. Why is it that I am telling you mostly sad stories? Is it possible that in my whole life, I had so many sad happenings and not any happy ones?
Well I should say here that I have had a few happy happenings, but if I had to tell you about my happy happenings they would be so few and very boring indeed, and nobody could or would be interested to hear them anyhow, because they seem to me that they are not important.
So, I would like to talk now most of all, about those happenings that have affected my life in a way, one could say that they have made me struggle during my life, as I have already said in my last hub, My life my struggles, this is the link to my life struggles, 
My life my struggles 
I know dear readers that you might be thinking that it is meaningless to write down all this useless stuff, as nobody might be willing to read it or get any benefit from it:
But I am thinking that if my writings survive in a hidden corner just for a generation or two, and even if my writings are not well written, as my English written skills are not the best at the present time. But I believe that in several years when time passes away, then whoever would be reading my writings will find them more interesting, because life was so different in the old days, so we used to live in a different way, you see, I have started to live my life long before the great changes of nowadays.
And if what I am writing here is going to be useless anyhow, I will do it just for practice, so that I would be able to improve my English language and also my writing skills. So that I could feel more confident within my own self, and therefore I would not feel to be in such a hopeless and desperate position; like that time when something happened to me at a certain stage of my life, but at that time I was not able to cope with it properly, and because I wasn’t able to cope that matter in my case became also very painful, because of what I wanted to reach and do but I wasn’t able to, here I am talking about a matter that was and indeed is a very delicate matter of personal nature, so I am not going to disclose anywhere willingly.
But I would like to tell you that my helpless and desperate feelings, I will write them later on including what was it that caused me so much distress; But this distress has also made me come to a decision, which is that I have to improve myself in my lacking writing skills. So, now although I am getting old, I will try very hard if I can to improve myself, so that, my improvements may still help me in my later years to reach where I have failed before. You see this is my view about life; when you fail you get up dust yourself and try again harder. 
Therefore by writing my own life story, I will also help myself to improve my English and my communication skills, which after all they are the art of being able to write or to say, the right words at the right time with the right meanings; since saying meaningful and skilful phrases is just like when one writes them down.
So please don’t be annoyed by my life story and allow me to write a few things that I have gone through during my own life. I would like to write them; so that I could show you how hard life can sometimes be, since this applies particularly to me; because during my life so many things have changed since I was a child; I know of course that things will still keep changing nowadays and in the future, and very likely even faster than before, but now because we know of the oncoming changes we are able to accept them more easily than before, and therefore they will not seem that bad to us anyhow, because at least we believe that we know where we are going in the near future.
An old man life story, IS TO BE CONTINUED: With another hub called, My farm life experience.  See you next time.


No comments: